I Double Dog Dare Me

Shit.
I realize I've been getting a little too complacent in my old age. I get into my groove and look up to realize half a year is gone and I haven't done anything much out of the ordinary. I haven't sought any excitement. That's not how I promised myself I would grow old. New adventures, new experiences. Small ones, big ones, life changing ones....anything as long as it's constantly new. This time a few years ago I was stranded in the desert wondering if the tow truck would actually come find us and even if they did, would the bike start? You talk about out of the ordinary...try watching the sunset in the mountains of the Arizona desert and realizing very quickly that there are no street lamps that will flicker on once that sun passes the horizon. But eventually the tow came and the adventure turned into a great story to tell. And that's important. It's not my money or status or age or beauty (OK, yeah that matters some) rather it is is when I am in a conversation that my audience finds me captivating.

And captivating isn't easy. I know, because I am continually working on it.

You'd think my fear of being boring would overwhelmingly admonish the complacency trait. The small voice in the back of my skull (that we ALL have) is constantly wondering if the words coming out of my mouth are intriguing to the listener. I honestly will say there are many a time when that little voice will say, "SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP" but it's as if the words are riding an express bus out of my mouth. If there are interesting stories being delivered on that express bus it redeems my conversation.

But you have to do shit to have shit to talk about.

Don't get me wrong, I love my routine. I love that I only have to consider one source (ME) and I am really easy to please so I play well with myself....oh stop giggling, that's not what I meant. I don't have to check-in or worry about conflicts. I do whatever floats my boat. Granted it's a little old row boat, but it's afloat.

But I'll admit, it gets lonely in my row boat. I would love to row up to a passing dock and take on a traveling companion once in awhile. I love to hear stories. I love to share my stories. I continue to believe that you experience things each and every day, but if you aren't able to experience them with someone occasionally it will feel like you imagined it. That passenger can assure you that you didn't.

If you are ever interested in sharing some stories with a girl in her row boat, just wave from the beach. I'd be happy to make room for the adventure.